After leaving a toxic relationship, one thing that may certainly happen is your abusive ex may, at times, desperately contact you with great intensity. Assuming that you’ve gone ‘no contact’ for a couple of months now, you may have, of course, deleted their phone number or even blocked them, but then all of a sudden, you find them persistently trying to reach out through different means. You’re left wondering what is behind it, and you may be filled with thoughts and scenarios of what the meaning of this could be. If you’re not fully aware of their games of deceit or when you’ve not worked on yourself, you may cave in to their persistence and even call them back, which is never a great idea as that might be a doorway back to the relationship which has already impacted your life. So, what do they do that out of the blue?

Fear of Abandonment

A manipulative person often harbors a deep-seated fear of abandonment and rejection, which drives them to go to great lengths in seeking acceptance and validation from others. This fear can stem from past experiences or unresolved emotional issues, leading them to develop manipulative behaviors as a means of controlling their environment and relationships. Your past responses to their behavior may have reinforced their belief that you’re a source of validation and acceptance. Therefore, when they feel threatened by the possibility of losing that validation, they may intensify their efforts to regain your attention and approval, even if it means calling you incessantly. You’re more of that go-to bandage to a wound that in not fully being addressed by them.

Testing your Boundaries

Another reason, closely related to the first one, is that manipulative individuals may call you simply to poke or nudge you and gauge your responsiveness to their influence. It’s like a test of their grip on you. If you don’t pick up or just stay there like a grey rock, they may interpret it as a sign that their control over you is slipping, and they might eventually leave you alone and direct their efforts elsewhere. However, if you give in and respond to their calls or messages, they will likely feel reinforced in their belief that they still have a hold over you. This response can validate their manipulative tactics and encourage them to continue seeking attention and validation from you.

So, Do You Cave in To Their Non-Stop Calls?

There’s only one thing you can do when it comes to someone, or your past ex who persistently calls you, and that is: do not give in. Keep blocking them and move on with your life. They know how to get to you and how to press those buttons that will make you miss them or lead you back to them, and the doorway is communication or contact. Without that, you will be saving yourself from another round of empty promises and abuse, especially when you still don’t understand yourself on a deeper level. Your friends or family may advise you to call them back and tell them to stop, but that is still opening the lines of communication. Even if they have changed, let your emotions not lie to you that you may have that relationship you once dreamt of. Continue your journey, work on you, and you will find someone with whom you can enjoy every moment of your life, which is yourself.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.