Have you ever found it really strange that someone can share how they love you so deeply, yet at the same time speak with such bitterness about everyone else?

Let’s say you’re a man dating a woman who tells you how amazing you are, how you’re different from all the other men. She showers you with affection and compliments each and every morning and you feel so good about.

You feel that you’ve already found that mother to your unborn babies. You share beautiful moments, and she makes you feel like you’re the exception. But in between those sweet words, she often says things like, “I hate men,” or “Men are just evil.”

At first, you might not think much of it. After all, she loves you, right? And that’s what matters, doesn’t it? What matters is the relationship between you and her. You might even take pride in being the one who changed her view of men. In short, you’re getting that sweetest side of that cake, so why bother? But that’s exactly where the danger begins.

Here’s the thing: when someone harbours deep resentment or bitterness toward other men, it’s a sign of their unfinished emotional business.

Their And you really need to be watchful because the moment you cross them or fail to meet their expectations, which is inevitable since we’re all human with different preferences, that same hate and resentment they have for other men will eventually be projected onto you.

You will shift from being the “special man” to becoming just like the men who ruined their life. That’s how a bruised ego operates; it looks for the perfect alibi to pour its frustrations onto instead of going inward and resolving the underlying issues that led to the development of that belief, such as “men are evil” or “I hate men.” It’s not their original belief but rather one adopted from past experiences.

We may talk about red flags like manipulation, ghosting, or lack of empathy and all that but one which we ignore is this kind of selective love- when someone elevates you while degrading everyone else. It’s like that extreme preferential treatment towards you while being strongly hateful towards other men.

This is not to say that you should love everyone. Some level of preference or dislike is normal, but when it becomes excessive, you need to step back a little so you don’t get intoxicated by their love bombing and can see them for who they really are.

You begin to spot the red flags when you see the person you’re dating as they are and pay attention to their unspoken language or rather what they say behind what they’re saying. How do they speak about others? Do they carry bitterness that disguises itself as growth?

Once you ask those questions, you’ll understand that maybe it’s not the right time to be around them, because their anger and resentment will eventually be directed at you when you fail to meet their expectations. They may initially elevate you as a saviour or a special person, but that illusion can easily flip-and you’ll become the villain overnight.

That’s why in relationships; you often find yourself wondering how someone could change so fast and become so hateful. But it’s not really that they changed suddenly- it’s that one of your actions may have triggered them to turn their inner compass of hate toward you. And once that happens, they start blaming you for every single thing that goes wrong in their life

That hateful compass is what leads to all kinds of abuse. When you’re not deeply rooted within yourself and lack self-understanding, you may think that you ruined the relationship or wish you could go back in time to undo some of your decisions. That is not an option.

It is they who need to get to the root of their hate, which can be challenging for someone not used to taking full ownership of their life, as they may believe their life is terrible because of men and show no responsibility for their present actions.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.