When you go through a painful experience in life, you experience painful emotions and when those emotions are not processed in the moment you’re experiencing that painful event, they become stuck emotions. You end up carrying those emotions with you and they become old emotional pain.

These old emotions are a result of the painful experiences that were not fully processed and accepted in the moment they occurred. It’s what Eckhart Tolle in his book “The Power of Now” refers to as the ‘pain body’ which is just the accumulation of old emotional pain. When a traumatic experience is not fully processed, it slips into the unconscious mind and becomes parts of the pain body.

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We develop this ‘pain body’ mostly in childhood especially when we’re brought up in an environment where our emotions are neglected or where we experience abuse from our caregivers. As a child when you’re distressed, you need an adult’s intervention to help you with those negative emotions.

If you receive proper care, validation and support, you’ll integrate these negative emotions and be able to learn how to self-regulate. On the other hand, if you don’t get the necessary interventions when you’re in distress on a regular basis, you’ll accumulate those negative emotions without fully processing them and they become part of your ‘pain body’.

We all have a pain body to some degree because of the things we absorb from our upbringing and our environment. Not all pain bodies are the same because we’ve all lived through different painful experiences but the more frequent the painful experiences the greater the pain body. It can be dormant or active and it is reactivated by external (being rejected by a lover) or internal triggers (a thought).

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The sensitivity of the triggers depends on the closeness of that trigger to the actual traumatic event in childhood that had a huge building block for the pain body. When the pain body is triggered, you will experience an extreme emotional reaction (e.g. full-blown rage) even when the triggering event didn’t necessitate such a huge emotional reaction.

For example, being so angry that traffic is not flowing or being angered by a house fly. The pain body usually take over our minds and we even identify with it. It can feed you with believes like, “I am always to blame” (case in point — for the narc’s changed behavior) even when something is beyond your scope of control.

When you’re stuck with the pain body, it is like parasite which will look for painful or scary instances to feed on. It will unconsciously lead you to instances that are hurtful as that pain is the energy it needs to survive. You will find yourself inflicting pain on yourself which leads to deep self-hatred or you beating yourself up for ending up in those painful situations and that pain is fed back to the pain body.

These negative energies are fed back to the pain body which then strengthens the pain body, it’s a vicious cycle of pain. In short, when you’re not aware of the pain you’re inflicting on yourself, you’ll just be feeding the dark side of your consciousness and making it even stronger. For example, going back to that toxic relationship feeds the pain body because it’s a place where you’re constantly in pain or when you’re gaslighting yourself for staying in a toxic relationship.

So, how you get rid of the pain body?

The first thing you have to do is to acknowledge that the pain body is there and you don’t need to feed it with more negative energy in the present moment. This doesn’t mean that you numb those emotions or you put on false positive vibes, it means you just allow it to be there without resistance.

You don’t need to beat yourself up for getting into those painful experiences, just be compassionate with yourself. It’s more of starving the pain or providing the pain body with less supply in the present moment. When you find yourself reacting excessively to a situation, do not hate yourself for the reaction but instead look at it as just an accumulation of all those painful experiences bottled in your subconscious.

The reaction is not just caused by a new emotion but it is an accumulation of old stuck emotions. Once you’ve started to show yourself some grace, then it’s time to go deeper to the original source of the pain. Find a safe space to process those past stuck emotions so that you can free yourself from that past negative experience.

Your resistance to a negative experience is what creates an identification with the resisted experience. The stronger the resistance of reality, the more charge (anchor) there is holding the identity of the pain body in place.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.