“A toxic relationship begins when someone disrespects or constantly violates your boundaries.”

One common early sign that the relationship will be toxic is if you’re dealing with someone who totally disregards or disrespects your boundaries. Boundaries are these invisible lines or guidelines you have about how someone is supposed to treat you.

Imagine you have established personal boundaries regarding finances, such as not lending money to a partner until you know them well, or regarding timekeeping, or perhaps based on your deeply held values. For instance, you may prioritize attending church or spending quality time with friends. However, when your partner consistently disregards these boundaries, it becomes a significant red flag. They may repeatedly violate your financial limits or pressure you to compromise your commitments and values. This disrespect of boundaries indicates a lack of respect for your autonomy and individuality within the relationship.

Constant reminders about your boundaries can be acceptable, especially in the early stages of a relationship. However, persistent boundary violations signal a lack of respect for your autonomy. This creates an unsafe environment for you. Moreover, boundary testing may not always occur overtly. It can manifest subtly through indirect jabs, such as harsh jokes or gaslighting, where your concerns are invalidated. This behavior undermines your sense of reality and diminishes the importance of your boundaries, portraying them as selfish or unreasonable. This is a crucial sign to watch for early in the relationship, as it indicates that you’re dealing with someone who prioritizes their own needs above yours and disregards the potential harm to you.

Another crucial aspect to understand is that you might feel compelled to lower your boundaries or compromise on your non-negotiables in order to salvage the relationship. However, it’s important to realize that by doing so, you’re sending a message to your partner that continuous pressure will eventually lead you to lowering all your boundaries. When you find yourself unable to assertively say no or maintain your boundaries, it’s vital not to let such instances slide. Instead, consider taking a step back or distancing yourself until you regain the strength to stand up for yourself. Lowering your boundaries sets a dangerous precedent and signifies the onset of a toxic relationship.

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Constant Criticism and Belittling

The third early common sign of a toxic relationship is constant criticism and belittling. If you find yourself being with someone who constantly criticizes you, they can criticize your clothing, your religion, your race, your background, your studies, your job or just about everything you do. They just criticize everything you do to the point where you really feel that there is nothing good coming out of what you do. They consistently seek out flaws in everything around them, except, of course, within themselves, often without considering alternatives or acknowledging any positives.

While constructive criticism can be beneficial for personal growth and improvement, constant and unfounded criticism that leaves you feeling demoralized and devalued is not healthy. In a supportive relationship, it’s natural for partners to offer feedback and suggestions for improvement, provided it’s done in a respectful and constructive manner. However, when criticism is all over the place and focuses solely on tearing you down without offering any guidance for improvement, it erodes your self-esteem and undermines you as a person.

Furthermore, it’s essential to recognize that criticism in the early stages of a relationship may not always be directed towards you. While your partner might offer praise or compliments towards you, they may simultaneously exhibit a pattern of constant criticism towards external entities such as the government, friends, or family. It is crucial to understand that sooner or later, this criticism is likely to extend to you as well.

They may initially lure you in with charms and praise to avoid scaring you away, but the truth is, they tend to heavily criticize or find faults in everything outside of themselves. This behavior is a clear indicator of someone who is deeply discontented with their lives. They may thrive or compensate for their dissatisfaction by constantly finding faults in other things or in everything around them.

When you’re facing this constant criticism early on from a potential partner, it’s crucial to proceed with caution before fully committing to the relationship. Ignoring such warning signs can lead to feelings of worthlessness and diminish your self-esteem over time.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.