When you’re in a relationship with a narcissist and it reaches the point where they’re bored with you or you no longer benefit them, it’s common for them to discard you and jump into another relationship. There’s typically no ‘grace period’ as in normal relationships. When they find someone new, your narcissistic ex may start showing them off or painting this picture of their ‘perfect relationship’ and position so that you can see.

They will not really ‘hide’ it, and to some extent, they will take actions to ensure that you know. Even if you’re practicing No Contact, they will find ways to obtain this information. So, you may be asking yourself, why do they do it and why can’t they enjoy their relationship far away from you?

The Fragile Ego

First, narcissists have a fragile ego and heavily rely on external validation or approval to feel good about themselves. We all seek validation to some degree; for example, sharing our adventures on social media for others to see instead of simply enjoying them. However, narcissists take this to the next level.

This may involve actions that hurt others, such as flaunting their new supply to paint a picture that they still possess what it takes to be admired and maintain a relationship.

By showcasing their new partner, they’re essentially saying, “Look at me! I’m still desirable! Someone loves me!” It’s as if they’re fishing for compliments, and those “Aww, you two look so happy together!” comments serve as another huge boost to their ego. They are easily triggered when they aren’t validated or approved of, which is why their ego compensates by seeking external validation or resorting to such extremes. They just want to maintain that façade of being superior and desirable.

Look at What You’re Missing

Another reason why they may show off their new relationship is just to rub it in your face about what you’re missing now that you’ve been discarded or left the relationship.

They want to degrade and devalue you as their old supply who is missing out or who lost them. To them, it’s all about winning, and by showing off, it simply implies they have won because they are now with someone else who is ‘better’.

In the narcissist’s distorted reality, everything revolves around them. If you’re no longer in their life, it must be because you’ve wronged them somehow. Maybe you stood up for yourself and maintained your boundaries, or perhaps you stopped participating in their deceitful games. Either way, in their eyes, you’ve committed the ultimate sin of not worshiping at the altar of their ego.

So, what do they do next? They find a new “toy” and make sure you see how much “fun” and “happiness” they’re having. It’s their way of saying, “See? I’m still awesome. You’re the one who messed up by losing me.”

You may feel bad or even regret losing them for real, especially if you haven’t taken the time to introspect and deal with your own emotions.

The Love Bombing

Another reason why they may show off their new supply is that it may not even be related to sending a message to you, but rather, it’s about grooming or idealizing their new partner. They may be love bombing their new partner with excessive affection and attention, and because it’s excessive, you end up hearing about it or even seeing it on social media. This behaviour may resemble what they did to you early in the relationship, but now they’re professing their ‘love’ to their new supply.

They want to groom their partner and prove to them that things are over between you and them by showcasing them publicly. After all, when someone is prominently displayed, it signals exclusivity and publicly declares the end of previous relationships.

Conclusion

A narcissist will do a lot of things to soothe their ego and meet their needs, and the list can be endless. But that’s what you’re really missing out on when you leave that relationship — you’re missing out on that deceit, on that manipulation, or on all those games, which is actually a good thing. You may feel really because of their actions, but the only way forward is for you to stand up and focus on yourself, on what you’re doing after leaving that relationship. That’s where you need to be.

If there’s one thing you can do, it’s to fully focus every breath in your present life on going inward and dealing with the pain that’s been inflicted on your life by that person whom you once cared for. That’s the only way you can take your power back and take care of yourself.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.

References

1. https://pp25-mindsettherapyonline.synergy.net/blog/why-do-narcissists-show-off-the-new-supply

2. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Pwdo58WCPDM